How to Handle Family Disputes Over Christmas: Legal Advice from a Family Solicitor

Why Christmas Can Be a Flashpoint for Family Disputes

For many families, Christmas is a time of joy and connection. But for separated parents or those in the process of divorcing, the festive season can bring stress, conflict, and uncertainty, especially when it comes to child arrangements.
From disagreements over who the children will spend Christmas Day with to last-minute changes or unmet expectations, disputes during the holidays are unfortunately common. These emotionally charged situations can have lasting effects on both parents and children if not handled with care.
At Arlingsworth, we help families navigate these difficult moments with legal clarity and compassion. Here’s what you need to know.

Step 1: Start Planning Early

  • The most effective way to prevent festive family disputes is to plan child arrangements well in advance. Waiting until December to agree plans often results in stress, miscommunication, or assumptions.
    When both parents are involved in early, open discussions, there is more time to:
    Account for travel plans

    Coordinate with extended family
  • Balance time fairly
  • Avoid last-minute surprises

Remember, children benefit most when arrangements are agreed calmly and in their best interests.

Step 2: Consider Mediation Before Court

If communication becomes difficult, mediation can help you find practical solutions quickly. Unlike the court process, mediation is:

  • Child-focused
  • Less costly
  • Confidential
  • Faster to arrange

A neutral mediator will help both parties work towards a balanced agreement. This might include:

  • Splitting Christmas Day
  • Alternating years
  • Agreeing on extended family time
  • Travel permissions
  • Mediation is not suitable in all cases, particularly where there is a history of domestic abuse, but for many families it is the best first step.

Step 3: Check or Apply for a Child Arrangements Order

If no agreement can be reached, you may need a Child Arrangements Order (CAO) from the court. This legally defines:

  • Who the child lives with
  • When and where they spend time with each parent
  • Any special arrangements for holidays

If you already have a CAO, review it to see if Christmas is specifically covered. If not, and disputes continue, you may be able to apply to vary the order. Keep in mind:

  • Courts expect you to attempt mediation first (via a MIAM)
  • Decisions can take time, so act early

Breaching a CAO, such as refusing contact over Christmas, can lead to enforcement actions including fines, community work, or changes to the order.

A Child-Centred Approach Is Always Best

If you already hold ILR or settled status, these changes will not apply to you. Also unaffected are those under the EU Settlement Scheme, Windrush Scheme, Armed Forces routes, and partners or children of British citizens on the five-year family route.

Who IS Affected?

Courts are clear: children have the right to maintain relationships with both parents wherever it is safe and appropriate to do so.

Even when emotions are high, it is crucial to focus on what is best for the child, not on past grievances or rigid fairness.

A few guiding questions:

  • Would I find these arrangements reasonable if roles were reversed?
  • Are we putting our child’s happiness above our disagreement?

Can this be handled with respect and flexibility?

How Arlingsworth Can Help

Every family situation is different. If you’re facing a disagreement over festive arrangements or feel your child’s best interests are not being met, our family solicitors can help.

We assist clients with:

  • Mediation referrals and preparation
  • Applying for or varying a CAO
  • Enforcing an existing CAO
  • Providing legal advice when communication breaks down

Don’t wait until emotions are running high. Early advice and action can make all the difference in ensuring a peaceful and positive Christmas for your children.

📞 01273 696962
 📩 info@arlingsworth.com